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Monday, July 6, 2009
Yahoo’s ridiculous list of the ‘top rated’ animated films
Movie lists so dominate the Internet that one could wallpaper every apartment in New York City with them. Let’s face it, the things are a dime a dozen, and most of them are quickly forgotten.
Every once in awhile, however, a list comes along that’s so egregiously ridiculous I can’t not blog about it. The latest list is the Yahoo Users Top Rated Animated Films.
I know, I know. “User” lists are always suspect, but some of the rankings here are so off the reservation, I don’t just disagree with the opinion. This one crosses the line into FACTUALLY wrong.
First, consider what’s NOT in the list: Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Pinocchio. Bambi. Smell suspicious yet? Just get a load of these rankings.
30) Transformers: The Movie: Oh hell no. I’d be willing to bet every circuit in my home theater system this woudn’t make the list if Transformers: ROTF weren’t in theaters now. That’s almost as revolting as the new movie.
29) The Simpsons Movie: Sure, why not.
28) Happy Feet: Not one of my favorites. I thought Cars and Monster House, which came out the same year, were both better, but I can see why some people love it.
27) Ice Age: The Meltdown: The stupid sequel makes the list but the halfway decent original does not? WTF?
26) Shrek 2: So it made more than $400 million. That doesn’t make it one of the best animated movies ever made. At least Shrek the Third didn’t make it.
25) Cinderellla: You bet your bibbidi-bobbidi-boo.
24) The Incredibles: Surprised it placed this low, actually.
23) Cars: Pixar’s weakest film, but it was a merchandising bonanza.
22) Shrek: It already looks dated, and many of the jokes are too.
21) Lady and the Tramp: Not gonna bark about that one.
20) Monsters Inc.: Nor that one.
19) Mulan: Wow. Higher than I thought.
18) The Little Mermaid: Wow. Lower than I thought.
17) Monsters vs. Aliens: You have GOT to be kidding me. NO!
16) Aladdin: How low can you go?
15) Coraline: Wow. That is one of the best movies of this year. But do you see a pattern here?
14) Finding Nemo: Not my favorite Pixar movie, but the favorite of many.
13) Princess Mononoke: Miyazaki rules. And this is one of his lesser efforts.
12) Ratatouille: I always loved that the critic got the best speech.
11) Howl’s Moving Castle: More great Miyazaki.
10) Beauty and the Beast: Higher. Higher still.
9) Toy Story: Great film, but I prefer the sequel, which … isn’t on the list. Urge to destroy rising.
8) The Nightmare Before Christmas: Urge to destroy falling …
7) My Neighbor Totoro: The Miyazaki film I haven’t seen I really need to see.
6) The Lion King: Inevitable, but still overrated.
5) Spirited Away: I agree this is Miyazaki’s best.
Now … get a load of the top 4.
4) Kung Fu Panda
3) Bolt
2) WALL-E
1) Up
What IS this, a list or a memory test? I know user ratings favor recent movies, but ye GODS! I would really love someone to look me in the eye and tell me with a straight face that Kung-Fu Panda is a better movie than, say, Dumbo.
You know that concoction in Who Framed Roger Rabbit called “the dip” that could kill toons? I’d like to pour that all over this preposterous compilation.
How about you?
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