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May\'s summer movies: Iron Man, Indy and more | Sir Critic on Cinema
 

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May’s summer movies: Iron Man, Indy and more

Well, folks, break out the sunglasses, the towels and the sandals - summer is here!

Oh wait, no, not that kind of summer. Break out the popcorn, the candy - and a big chunk of money - because the summer movie season starts this Friday.

All week long on the blog, if all goes according to plan, I will forecast the summer movies, tackling one month per day, and topping e’m all off with my review of Iron Man on Friday. So that means that today I will tackle May’s movies.

Each movie will receive a prospect grade. This does NOT indicate how well I think the movie will do at the box office, but rather, how anxious I am to see it, according to the following scale:

A = I want to see it yesterday!

B = Not a must-see, but looks solidly entertaining.

C = Have a day.

D = D is for dreadful, dumb, dopey, dreary …

F = There’s a better chance at getting a date with Amy Adams than seeing this.

However , for the first time, I will also include a ROUGH box office estimate. I’m not great with numbers, so when I turn out to be wrong, I shall blame my inferior math skills. Do NOT place any bets based on my numbers; I won’t take that responsibility.

On with the shows:

MAY 2

Iron Man

The lowdown: Man in metal suit flies around a lot and blows things up.
The box office: $200 million
The forecast: The trailers are dynamite; Robert Downey Jr. seems to be having entirely too much fun in the lead. Gwyneth Paltrow only sweetens the deal. And this could make director Jon Favreau (Elf, the grossly underrated Zathura) into an A-list director. Early reviews are very promising, and pent-up demand for a solid E-ticket attraction will boost its numbers.
The prospect: A

Made of Honor

The lowdown: Patrick Dempsey realizes he’s in love with best bud Michelle Monaghan, then she goes and gets engaged to someone else.
The box office: Maybe $50M if they’re lucky.
The forecast: Patrick Dempsey already showed he can carry a romance with Enchanted, and Monaghan has enough charisma to be a bigger star, but what is one to think when the filmmakers’ credits include Surviving Christmas and Leonard Part 6?
The prospect: C

MAY 9

Speed Racer

The lowdown: The Japanese animated toon comes to the big screen courtesy of the Matrix team.
The box office: $130-$150 M
The forecast: The candy-colored effects certainly look wild, although how much mileage the Wachowskis can get out of this is anyone’s guess. The marketing seems slightly confused, in that they seem to be aiming for families, but interest is high among older audiences. A real wild card.
The Prospect: B

What Happens in Vegas …

The lowdown: Ashton Kutcher and Cameron Diaz marry each other in a drunken haze, then have to make the marriage work for real to split millions Kutcher wins. So it’s kinda like “Britney’s First Wedding: The Movie.”
The box office: Around $60 million
The forecast: The trailer seemed flat to me, but this is developing pretty decent buzz, and some people seem to think it could actually beat Speed Racer on opening weekend. I’m not fully convinced, but it could break out.
The Prospect: B

MAY 16

The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

The lowdown: The kids return to Narnia one year later in their time, but many, many years later in Narnia time, finding it in ruins. Can they help the prince claim his rightful place?
The box office: $250 million
The forecast: I liked but did not love the first movie; the sequel looks to have more action. However, I think it may do just a bit less well than its predecessor did, with only one week to go before Indy.
Prospect: B

MAY 22-23

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (on Thursday)

The lowdown: As if you didn’t know.
The box office: $350-$400 million.
The forecast: Will be HUGE even if Shia LaBeouf is the new Jar-Jar - which I highly doubt.
The prospect: A
Looking for you: Doctor Jones may not attract the kind of rabid followers Star Wars is famous for, but we know he has fans out there - and we want to hear from you for a story we’ll publish next month before the new movie comes out. Tell us: What makes Indy endure as he has? Do you have any Indiana Jones gear? Do you feel overshadowed by fans of more fanciful fare like Star Wars or Harry Potter?

And here’s an added bonus - if any of you are good with a whip, let us know - we’ve got a whip we’d like you to try out. We have no snakes, we promise.

Contact me (Eric Robinette) via email at erobinette@coxohio.com, or phone me at (513) 705-2836.

It’ll be fun - trust me.

Postal (on Friday)

The lowdown/the forecast: Uwe Boll directed. That’s all you (or I) need to know.
The box office: Less than $5 million
The prospect: F

MAY 30

Sex and the City: The Movie

The lowdown: The girls sashay onto the big screen in preparation of Carrie’s wedding to Mr. Big.
The box office: $90-$100 million
The forecast: Many people with no Y chromosomes are oooh-ing and aah-ing over this one; I have a feeling it will be much bigger than some observers expect.
The prospect: B

The Strangers

The lowdown: A couple (Scott Speedman and Liv Tyler) are holed up in a vacation home when they are terrorized by three unknown assailants.
The box office: $10 million, if that
The forecast: I don’t talk to strangers.
The prospect: F

So that’s May’s roster. What looks good? Not so good? What will you kill to see or die before seeing?

Coming Tuesday: June’s lineup, including Get Smart, WALL-E and The Incredible Hulk

Permalink | Comments (3) | Post your comment | Categories: Coming Attractions

Comments

By Allie D.

April 28, 2008 4:20 PM | Link to this

I just bought my advance screening ticket to Iron Man Thursday night at midnight. YAaaay! I am so excited about this one. Indy I am definitely seeing. Speed Racer looks absolutely unreal. I say “unreal” because it could swing either way. Unreal good or unreal horrid. lol As for Sex and the City, I found the trailer to be incredibly insipid. Maybe I have just fallen out of sync with those ladies since the show wrapped… I doubt I’ll be flocking to see it in theaters.

By SRCputt

April 28, 2008 3:20 PM | Link to this

Looks like Speed Racer is a no middle ground film. It will either be awesome or a mess. I am intrigued by it, myself. Iron Man has an interesting petigree. And I never miss a Spielberg film. But other than those three, I’m not that excited.

By Kim S.

April 28, 2008 10:43 AM | Link to this

The only must see that I have is “Iron Man”. “Indy” I will see for nostalgic reasons - I’m actually going to take my mom with me. Most of the rest are DVD rentals to me - “Made of Honor”, “Postal” (yes I did mean that), “Sex and the City” and “Strangers”. “Caspian” I would see, but I didn’t see “Narnia” yet, so that will wait. The only hell nos for me are “Vegas” and “Speed Racer”. If the trailer gives me a headache, no way will I see the film!
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